Sick as a What???

I originally planned this blog-thing as a strictly 2007 endeavor, but then I got across something that made me reconcider.

For the past three days I’ve been struck down by what most call a common cold. I myself see it as my body’s final chance at a much-needed rest I kept dodging throughout the holidays. In any case, I dealt with it following some very simple and equally effective guidelines:

STAY IN BED – Sleeping when possible. I mean really stay in bed. Have water, juice and tissues at arm’s reach (a full roll of toilet paper is more handy actually). Chamberpots are hard to come by these days, so I actually did get up once in a while, but that’s okay as long as I don’t indulge myself.

STAY ALONE – Celebrating my misery (both bodily and spiritual) is like a visit to the toilet. It’s always done best by myself alone. I don’t need anyone to cheer, and thank you all for your sympathy – really – but you can express it later on. I won’t forget. Plus, there’s always the danger of passing it on to somebody and have his/her moans and wet cough haunting me after I’ve left my disease behind.

ONLY NATURAL DRUGS – Some juice, hot chamomile, rubbling with tsipouro in case of extreme cough. No pills – no syrups. Pot is allowed.

Anyway, I got carried away. The real reasons for this post are a couple of American posters (30’s & 40’s) I stumbled upon on the matter.

On the first one, the Respected W.H.Runcie of the Town of Hempstead educates his fellow citizens on the value of collectedness and boosts the local economy, at least in the medical sector, responding to long-standing complaints from his fellow physicians that those damn farmers can’t even spell Influenza – let alone catch it, and that they won’t even say how-d’you-do when they come across you on the street until their neighbour’s daughter get’s banged-up.

The next one is a real jewel.

Sensitive...

Compassionate...

Caring...

One thing though… Maybe they should have a third tab. Like:

These arms could in turn produce:

50.000 dead Nazis/Japs

130.000 cripple Nazis/Japs

500.000 homeless Nazis/Japs

Everytime you sneeze, another blood-thirsty Nazi/Jap gets to see the dawn!!!

Related to the above, I can't help including an - only loosely - related poster, that touched me. I am sure many managers of today long for the days things like that actually worked (though judging from stuff I see at work, some may think they still do)

American propaganda is a favourite subject for me, I’ll try to get back on this sometime later. Until then, some more rip-offs for the road:

"A cough is a symptom, not a disease. Take it to your doctor and he can give you something serious to worry about."

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint."

"Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway."

"Every man's disease is his personal property."

"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol."

"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer."

"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."

"Our body is a machine for living. It is organized for that, it is its nature. Let life go on in it unhindered and let it defend itself, it will do more than if you paralyze it by encumbering it with remedies."

"Red meat is not bad for you. Now blue-green meat, that's bad for you!"

"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not."